All the moral virtues in their highest elevation do not make a saint, but here is his true character, he is one that fears God. – Thomas Watson in The Great Gain of Godliness
Monthly Archive for August, 2007
We have quite a few baptisms in our church, and families celebrate the occasion in different ways. I’ve been to a few of these gatherings, and I’ve been very impressed at the way some families make it a real occasion. Some extend an invitation to the church at large and ask everyone to bring something, potluck style, to a park or auditorium. Others send out invitations to a few friends and family and have it at (or in)Â their home.
Just a couple of weeks ago we were invited to a celebration held on a Sunday evening instead of right after the service. The parents have southern roots, so they fixed a low country boil for all the guests. This was arranged outside with a camp stove, and after the boil was ready, it was dumped into a big laundry basket and from there onto a big platter. If you’ve never had a low country boil, I should tell you what’s in it: corn on the cob, Continue reading ‘Baptismal Feasts’
One of the best things that parents can do for their children is to teach them to have clear standards so they can navigate once they are away from home or out on their own. Standards are simply moral guidelines, a set of principles, boundaries that you don’t cross, a fence of protection. Young men and women need to have standards so they are not caught unprepared by the circumstances around them.
Parents may have standards for their daughters when they are living at home, things like curfew, dating or not dating, movies, music, etc. But these have to be internalized in order for them to do any real long-lasting good.
Titus 2:11-12 says, “For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age…” I like the way the NIV renders this passage. It’s something like “teaching us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly lusts…”
Young women in particular need very much to learn to say, “No.” It does not come naturally to most young women because they are usually way too worried about hurting feelings or being rude. Somewhere along the way, women developed a fear of being rude, even if it means being on the receiving end of quite a bit of rude conduct from men. It may start out innocently enough. For Continue reading ‘The Grace to Say NO’
In a letter to her son, Abby Aldrich Rockefeller wrote these words:
“I am happy and contented wherever your father happens to be. He means home to me. I really feel sorry for the unhappy people who cannot find companionship in their married lives. I do not believe it is something that happens. I think it is something that is achieved.”
This reminds me of something my mother-in-law has said, quoting a friend of hers who remarked that even a Quonset hut looks pretty good if a husband is in it. I would add, especially if your husband is your best and true companion.
Mothers of young children need to walk in wisdom, because self-sacrifice and diligence and patience are required around the clock. But God gives more grace when we ask for it, and wise mothers need to be asking for grace as much as their children are asking for drinks and treats and food in general. As soon as my daughter was big enough to get out of bed by herself, she would come to my bedside in the early morning and begin whispering very courteously in my ear, “Ba-na-na, ba-na-na, ba-na-na.” She must have coached my younger daughter a few years later, because she would do the same thing except expand the menu: “Ba-na-na…toast…cheerios…juice….” That is about the time, just as my eyes were opening, that I needed to start asking God for grace, eager, like my children, for results.
A wise mother bestows on her children, she does not demand. She teaches with Continue reading ‘More Grace for Mothers’
Just when I think I have finally learned something, some new provocation arises to prove to me that I really haven’t gotten it at all. And that, in turn, helps to teach me my great need to bear with others since they are probably learning at the same rate I am, which means slowly. In other words, I give them plenty of opportunities to bear with me.
For example, living in community means expecting a certain amount of bumps and collisions, which requires extending forgiveness and taking it easy. A community is full of characters of all sorts, and this means there will be lots of bungling on all sides, including my side. But just knowing this is not enough. Just when I think I have this down pat, I find that I have either given offense to someone, or I am provoked by someone in an unexpected way. How I react Continue reading ‘Life in Community’
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