Howdy all! So, I’ve been moving the last week, and thus have been out of the loop on all this bikini hoopla that’s been occurring. I’ve just gotten up to speed, and I have something to say. Something that originally came from my husband.
Think of a gorgeous, sleek, expensive, sports car. As it drives past, people notice. And they know that that’s a fast car. Everyone knows it’s a fast car. You can tell a mile away that it’s a fast car. You’d have to be a complete idiot to not know what kind of car it is.
Now picture a jacked up muscle car with the hood off to expose the wildly chromed-out engine. This is the car owner who is so desperate for everyone to notice the size of the engine that he’s going to make an ostentatious show of it. There you have the woman in a bikini. The woman who’s loudly screaming at everyone in this and adjoining counties that she’d like everyone to notice the size of the engine.
Seriously ladies. Which car would you rather be? People seem to think that if they’re not the muscle car then everyone will think they’re slow. But it’s not like we are only given a choice between being a low-class muscle car or a rusted-out Volkswagen Rabbit Pickup. There are more options out there. A Lamborghini doesn’t have to take the hood off. Everyone knows it’s fast.
Be the Lamborghini. (Not the Goat.)
Upon reflection . . . that goat remark may be a little ambiguous. So for anyone who didn’t get it, I have found a helpful visual aid. Here is a goat. (As in, a GTO.)
Thank you, Bekah – and Ben- for the car analogy. Great!
I guess maybe I am a long van, with some dents here and there, a little peeling paint -but still plugging away, with kids happily sticking their arms out of the windows and bouncing along with me and my trusty mechanic..
I don’t want to see a bikini on that one myself…not really even considering one at this point.
And don’t be a wolf in Lamborghini’s clothing, either, eh?
No offense to our lovely hostesses, but sometimes the best part of Femina is Valerie’s comments. Just sayin’…
Bekah — Oh, I thought you were deliberately making a sheep/goats pun! Well, if it wasn’t intentional, that just means you’re subconsciously brilliant.
Amanda — *blush*
Ha! I thought there was some sort of lamb/goat pun going on in those last two paragraphs, too. But the rusted Rabbit threw me off. Well, at any rate, I now know which creatures to avoid at the vehicular petting zoo and at the pool.
Thanks for this great metaphor! My husband is a total gear-head and so far we have a family of boys that are definitely taking after their wonderful dad, so this will be a very helpful teaching tool.
Never thought I’d see the day a Wilson advocated fast women
Right on!
Oh, Natalie I am so glad someone else saw the funny irony of being likened to a fast woman
My husband is going to like your husband’s illustration.
Valerie, Amanda is right. One of the things I appreciate is your nimbleness.
Great illustration Merkles!
LOVED all of these articles!!!!! AMEN!!!!! So completely true and needs to be preached more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bekah – You had a picture once of a blue piano I think that you painted. May have been on your England blog. Do you know where I can find it? Thanks!
Kat — http://www.feminagirls.com/2008/10/24/one-of-those-whims-you-get-sometimes/
“rusted-out Volkswagen Rabbit Pickup” – that was excellent.
I love this illustration! Isn’t it true, though, that some Christians wouldn’t even let the Lamborghini out of the house? I’ve encountered the view that harnesses young women with the guilt of all male lust, making them ashamed of even a modest outfit that is flattering. I want to be a Lamborghini, but I feel bad for all the girls who just get the tarp thrown over them!